Inside The Star
Let’s start with the obvious: this mock draft would never happen in real life.
Not because the trade is reckless, or the value is questionable, and definitely not because Philadelphia suddenly grew a conscience.
It wouldn’t happen because the Eagles would rather eat a bad contract than accidentally help the Cowboys do something that resembles competency.
And honestly? I respect the hate.
In this mock scenario, Dallas trades Pick No. 15 to Philly and receives:
On paper, it looks like a logical trade. Dallas slides back, stays in the first round, and adds two extra Day 2 picks. It’s the exact type of move draft Twitter begs for every April.
Which is precisely why the Eagles would never allow this trade to happen, and we all know this.
We have watched Philly trade within the division, but only as long as they can later explain how they “won” the deal.
The moment Dallas walks away with flexibility, depth, and options, I bet the Eagles would suddenly discover a bad connection and hang up the phone.
This is where Eagles fans would begin typing in all caps.
Parker slipping to No. 21 is the kind of thing Philly would later describe as “unrealistic”, or “rigged”, despite the fact that the board falls weird every single year.
If you have watched him play, he’s explosive, disruptive, and exactly the type of defender who shows up twice a year, against a certain team, and ruins carefully curated narratives.
Naturally, we all know Eagles fans would insist he’s “overrated” by Week 3.
Ah yes, the trenches.
Philadelphia loves reminding everyone that football is won up front, usually right before dismissing a Cowboys offensive line pick as “boring.”
Mauigoa gives Dallas long-term stability, depth, and insurance on the offensive line. Oh, and Terence Steele is terrible.
This is not a jersey-selling pick, but it’s the kind that quietly keeps your quarterback upright while Eagles fans explain to all of us how their linemen are the best.
Chris Johnson isn’t a headline pick, which means Eagles fans would immediately say he “won’t matter.”
That is, until we see him playing meaningful snaps in December while everyone pretends they never mouthed this pick.
Cornerback depth only matters when you don’t have it, a lesson the Cowboys know all to well.
Jacob Rodriguez is arrogant and violent on the football field. He started his own Heisman campaign, and had good cause to be a finalist.
This is the type of...
